How about you say nothing

I've read several blog posts all with the same theme in response to the bombing during the Boston Marathon this week... 

"What do we say to our children?"

It's interesting and ironic to me that this question is the same question that is asked every time something horrible becomes a national media circus.  

And, by using the term media circus I don't mean to imply that this isn't a tragedy that needs media attention - I am just calling it like I see it. Because all the while the focus has been on Boston, rescuers have been searching for possible survivors of a horrific Texas tragedy, Chicagoans are building Arks, and murderers, child molesters, and rapists are on the run all over the world.  Boston just happens to be getting all the focus (even though they keep repeating the same information and even went so far as to report that an uncle of the suspect was apologizing to his neighbors for the circus in their neighborhood)

I'm surprised that that a standard answer to this question hasn't been found and a whole classification of books written by "experts" hasn't been created.  But, in truth, I'm mostly saddened that another generation of parents with young children is faced with figuring out what to say. 

I have to wonder if maybe they shouldn't say anything.

I'm from the school of thought that requires a parent to shield their children from this kind of thing until they reach an age where they are mature enough to handle the information; even if it means the parent doesn't get to watch CNN continuously. I believe in turning off the tv, internet, and radio and spending quality time with your children instead of letting the monsters in.  

Minimize the nightmares, maximize the memories.

Growing Up

My time in the carpool line has been made considerably more enjoyable because of books (paper and electronic) text messages and games on my phone.

I did finally, after 3+ years of threatening, get a smart phone.  I don't feel smarter, but I am a lot better at bejeweled.  

I'm waiting to hear from ThePrincess to see if: 

I'll be in the carpool line today (probably not)
Is she going to the football game (of course)
Would she like a sandwich delivered (probably)
Are her plans going to mess with my plans (absolutely)
Do I REALLY care (nope)

Enjoying her while I've got her.....because before I know it she'll be gone..

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Trying to put on my big girl smile

I assume, possibly incorrectly, that most people with school age children are either in the throes of getting them ready for another year of education or have just sent them on their way.

I just sent ThePrincess back to school, at 16 she doesn't require what she once did to go back to school.  Hasn't grown out of her uniforms from last spring, doesn't have a school supply list that includes an item that can only be purchased on every other Wednesday from 1:00 to 3:25 in a town 45 miles away, didn't need new shoes or a haircut. 

The logistics of it seem to get easier every year, the emotions and feeling of impeding loss are a whole different story.  I've almost always been the one to drop her at the school doors in the morning and pick her back up in the afternoon and I know that the special time I've had is quickly coming to an end. 

It won't be long and she'll be doing all the driving for herself. It won't be long until she is off to college....  Is it possible to have empty nest syndrome before they've even left?

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The Internet Isn't For Parents Of Teenagers

When I wandered into this crazy place people call the interwebs many years ago I was not the parent of teenagers.  I had a tween and a child (12 & 9 respectively) and there was plenty of information available on how not to fuck them up, or if you had already done a number on them how one might correct a mistake or two.  Lots of products for the little ones were paraded across my screen daily - surely this toy, that brand of toothpaste, this juice would make my child happier, healthier and a better citizen of the world.

But then, my children grew and became immature versions of little adult like people and the internet seemed to forget they existed.  The advice (and assvice) dissapeared, nobody tried to sell me toys anymore, toothpaste companies didn't care if their teeth rotted out, and juice is not for teens ~ or at least that seems to be what advertising executives seem to believe.  

Sure, things are advertised directly to my kids but there is a mountain of products and information that seems to be flying under the radar and it is the stuff that should be aimed at me since I'm the one with the checkbook.  

Teen drivers - becoming one, staying one, insuring one, rules for one....

Teen health - from acne and sports injuries to nutrition and mental health...

Teen education - the over-acheiver, the under-achiever, SAT, ACT,  ADHD, homework management, college requirements....

Teen social - reasonable rules and expectations, please don't have sex, do I smell beer on your breath, whose house are you at, all your friends can't be in the computer, turn that tv off, that is not a skirt - that is a belt!, social media for parents.....

Teen aging - preparing them for life beyond high school & living with the rents, daily life skills, banking, balancing a checkbook, doing laundry...

College - do I have a kid who belongs in college?, how to pay for it, where to visit, when to visit, who to see, how to help make the decision of where to go, setting rules & expectations for the college bound, what they need to take with them...

And I've only scratched the surface.....

You'd think with a teenage son who likes to attract the ladies the least I'd see is an advertisement for Axe, convincing me that if I buy it I will have a happy, healthy, better smelling, good citizen of the world.

When Life Gives You Limes

This years back-to-school ritual has been a little bitter sweet at Motorcycle Headquarters. After 10 years of back-to-schools involving a trip to St. School, we no longer make a trip there. And, despite my great protests, my children have insisted on growing up (ThePrincess shot up 3 inches this summer) and I am now the mother of 2 freshman. It wouldn't be so painful if Gameboy & ThePrincess were fraternal twins and they were starting St. High School together...but Gameboy is flashing his college id like it's some kind of special pass to greatness.

The bills associated with this round of back-to-school have been a lot more than any other year before and I feel ashamed for every having complained in the past. Fortunately I have a good outlook on life and make the best of every situation!

When Life Gives me Limes I Make Margaritas!
No Limes - Low Cal - No Blender- Bottom Shelf

The Cast Of Characters

Back Row: Fancy Glass, Tequila
Front Row: Lime Margarita Drink Mix, Margarita Salt
Not Pictured: Ice & Water

I discovered this recipe when I spotted this box on a shelf at Target
I encourage you to buy it
- create demand -
keep them making it year round
I have no idea how it tastes in water alone

(Target has no idea who I am and I am not receiving anything for pimping this product other than hoping you go buy some so they don't stop making it because MY CHILDREN KEEP HAVING BIRTHDAYS!)

LETS BEGIN!

Put some water on a dinner plate

and dip the rim of your fancy glass in it
(Fancy Glass not required but I like to feel fancy so I use them)

Then roll it in the Margarita Salt

We have 2 glasses to do


Add Ice to the fancy glasses & set aside


In a separate glass measure out some tequila!

We're making 2 Margaritas so we're using 1/2 a cup of tequila


then adding One and 1/2 cups of water to the tequila
(3/4 cups per serving)


and pouring in 2 of the
Market Pantry Lime Margarita Drink Mix Packets



Stir Mr. Motorcycle Stir!
until the powder is dissolved & the tequila is all in my 1/2 of the glass.

Pour into your prepared glasses -


And Enjoy!

Also - pretend you are so young you couldn't possibly have children old enough to be in high school, drive, think about college, go to college, or vote.

My Vast Internet Empire

CursingMama's Vast Internet Empire


Note: the benevolent leader wears cute pink clothes
and rules all the margaritas as well

The other day, completely out of left field (while in a group of people whom I was not comfortable revealing the extent of my vast internet empire to) the following took place:

Gameboy: Mom
CursingMama: Fiddling with itouch game called Unblockme free which flummoxes me mightily. I am not a great puzzle solver, or maze runner.

Gameboy: (louder) Mom!
CursingMama: What?!?
(concentration totally broken)

Gameboy: Do you Twitter?
CursingMama: What?
(fine, it was a stalling technique)

Gameboy: Do. You. TW IT TER ?
(condescending little fuck don't you think?)
(probably learned it from his father, his mother would never speak to anyone in that manner.)

CursingMama: No, Do You?
(liar, liar, pants on fire)

Gameboy: Eerily silent
CursingMama: goes back to mastering Unblockme making mental note to scour Twitter for son.